the pressure of a maiden voyage into the official blogosphere is immense. what to write about? where to begin? i decided to start with a thru-line. as long as i can remember, all three of these elements have contributed to who i am this time around. my best guess is, this blog will always fall under the category of either sex, drugs, music or all three. you can also expect far fetched opinions on films, books and locals.
my name is christina and i live in asheville. north carolina has become not only the state in which i was born and raised, but a symbol for higher expectations in the new world. i believe in the soil where i plant my seeds. i believe there are many here who will see 2020 and be influential in shaping a new way of life for humanity. i don't care to make this a chronological history lesson on why i am what i am. i don't care to make excuses for offending you or to offer explanations for my sometimes warped perspective. i do vow to tell the truth on any given day as i see it through my unique set of balls. my eyeballs are my only organic set, but i have a nice collection of ebony and steel.
between piles of laundry that breed like catholics and beanie babies by the dozen displaying adventure scenarios in every room, i live in a rock and roll fantasy. just outside the picture window in my den, cow fields become stadiums all over the world and the best of the bovine raise their lighters when i do that one ballad about how you wore a muumuu the first time we made love. you know who you are. i write songs with a full band in my mind and i'm constantly changing the line-up. it's so much easier to roll over personnel without having to actually get attached to their quirky awesomeness or fire them face-to-face. since they never knew they were your star bass player, they're not disappointed when someone else suddenly is. someday perhaps i'll get out of my head and actually sing with a band.
the drugs aspect of my life isn't nearly as exciting as it should be, but this isn't amsterdam. of course, neither is amsterdam for much longer. the only thing i can say on a personal front is that i'm 100% for the end of prohibition against marijuana and believe the insidious plague of prescription drugs that, more often than not, inhibit the body's natural ability to heal should be inserted anally into any right-wing, homophobic, racist nutjob you can hold down long enough. that's right - the entire plague - that's a little bit of every blue, pink and purple pill that over half the nation is taking ground up into one junkie's dream of a suppository. wham. bam. thank you ma'am.
speaking of sex, i'm in a renewed place of exploration. a third of my life has passed and i realize i still haven't realized so many simple fantasies. after a decade of virtual calm in the bedroom i have been re-introduced to the sexual revolutionary i claimed to be in the late 80's and early 90's. in reigniting conversations and interests after so many years the most blatant realization is that our world is still stuck in a proverbial chokehold when it comes to sex. if anything, i think our culture may have regressed; and the illusions of rom-com cute meets and life long monogamy are more disturbing to me now than they were 20 years ago. somewhere between bending my ex-husband over and fucking him up the ass with a 12-inch black dildo and raising a man who would hopefully never warrant such a fantasy against him, lies a starving musician with grey streaks in her hair and a serious interest in the male multiple orgasm. the xinaphiles are not to be taken lightly, but you shouldn't ever take them too seriously either. mature audiences only.
i am an anti-feminist raising two men in a world that values brawn and bosom over intellect and supports a system led by greed and mass programming of mass confusion, while exhibiting a work ethic that resembles futility. some days i am suicidal. some days i am homicidal. every day, i believe humans are designed to overcome trauma, oppression and challenges of the natural world with fundamental skills that allow the mind to control the matter. i believe physical maladies are the direct result of emotional issues that the conscious mind is refusing to address. i believe i have initially failed at most of the things i have attempted, but through patience and perseverance have learned countless skills and experienced extreme successes. i believe i have a perspective that has the power to comfort, heal and hopefully amuse. welcome to my world.
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